Lots to Say (in limerick to express happiness)

I’ve been far too busy this week
fundraising events of which to speak
I stood up in a crowd
raised eighty-eight pound
which is pretty much life at its peak.

As the lecture drew itself to a close
and Dr Chris Atherton finished her prose
I went down to the front
and began with a grunt
told the audience what I propose.

After several seconds of blinking
the crowd cried “have you been drinking?
Unless you guys fly
you’re likely to die
what the bloody hell were you thinking?”

But sway them I did with my speech
as they left they gave handfuls of change each
“Good luck!” they each said
pat me on my head
imagining my corpse would wash up on a beach.

The next day I was at Steph’s place preparing
made bracelets from elastic and ball-bearings
we’d also bought lolly-pops
to stuff into patrons’ chops
as reward for donations they gave if unsparing.

Our spirits were particularly high
we’d found pub landlords happy to comply
but as we headed out
realised no-one was about
and sponsorship seemed hard to come by.

Irrespective of this customer shortfall
we visited eight bars in all
it rained and was cold
the bucket was heavy with gold
we made over one-hundred quid this pub-crawl.

On our way home we were shocked
at the generosity of the hard-knocked
an old toothless gent
sitting on the pavement
gave us all of his change, my heart rocked.

Crap! I forgot to get a picture for my website again. Quick, hold all this stuff for a second and pose!

Special thanks to Dr Chris Atherton and all the students in PS2500 for helping me raise £88.50 on Tuesday. Also thanks go out to Preston’s The Adelphi, The Bitter Suite, The Dog and Partridge, The Guild, The Lamb and Packet, The Mad Ferret, Source Bar and Roper Hall and all of their patrons and also the amazing itinerant gentleman on Friargate for their generous donations on Wednesday helping Steph and I raise £114.96 between us, £57.48 each. My tutor, Dr Nikola Bridges also deserves a mention for her fantastic sponsorship of £10 online, thank-you very much. This brings my total up to £338.02.


Due to last-minute popular demand, LCD has kept the registration for Hitch open for an extra while. This Monday the 14th of February is the new closing date, so get in there while you still can for the best thing you’ll have done with your life. Keep yourself updated by clicking here, and don’t forget to sponsor me here. Thanks.